Melvin Feller MA Discusses Why it is better to Wholesale then Being a Landlord.
I thought I might share some lessons and observations that I have made while being a property owner.
I
swear on at least two of my Tenants graves… EVERYONE of these things
really did happen and by the way, shame on you for thinking the only
reason I stuck with wholesaling was I wanted easy money.
1.
If someone is shot in your house, regular carpet cleaner (Resolve) does
not work to remove the nasty stuff that comes out when you are shot. In
addition, even crackheads will puke when they smell it.
2.
Normal people do not want to live in a house where the neighbors have
spray painted R.I.P James Smith on the sidewalk. One of my houses did.
3.
If a tenant calls and begins the conversation with “I have always liked
you”, or ” I hope you are having a blessed day” it really means “I do
not intend on paying rent this month”
4.
When a prospective tenant tells you “I live with my grandmother, or any
other relative” they are actually saying “There is not a chance in Hell
I’ve ever had a landlord that would recommend you let me move in”
5.
If a tenant offers to paint a rental unit for their security deposit,
and they say they are good painters. It really means that they are
experts at painting tile, wood floors, and windows, but your walls may
not turn out very good. Do they make a 2000 square feet tarp?
6.
When a tenant says that they “Don’t do drugs” they really mean, “I
don’t do certain drugs”. I ask, “Do you do drugs?” they say to me “No I
hate drugs”, they actually mean, “I hate crack, but weed and Vicodin are
staples in my life”
7.
If your ceiling is torn down in one of your rental properties and the
tenant tries to convince you that “It just Fell”, what they really mean
is “There was a drug bust here, and we were growing weed in the
ceiling”… “There is no way that’s coming out of my deposit,” they say
8.
Somehow the postal system is being very discriminate, only my tenants.
This is an actual quote “Eric, I know this is the third month in a row
that my social security check has not shown up on time, but the
postmaster said “He fixed it”.
9.
Do not call a heating and cooling person when a tenant calls and says,
“My furnace isn’t working” because what they really mean is “I have the
heat set at 90 and its 95 in here, so my furnace isn’t coming on”.
10.
This is just a suspicion, but I think tenants are conspiring with the
gas companies, because I have walked into units where the property owner
is paying the heat and I swear you could cook an egg on top of their
big screen TV, and they have all the windows open in the middle of
winter. When asked why the windows were open, and the furnace was on and
they replied “The heats Free”. Almost as if the gas company gives them a
dollar for every dollar, they waste on gas.
11.
A house is just not a house, until it has what I call the “Ghetto stamp
of approval”, this is when I install new carpet and within 30 minutes
of moving in, the tenant has burned the outline of the iron into the
carpet in at least 6 spots. What are they doing ironing anyway? Unless
they need to wear a suit and tie to the Department of human services. It
sounds cruel but out of 30 units, not even ONE had a regular job.
12.
I have found this very interesting, I live in a nice neighborhood with
very nice homes, and many of my neighbors work 60+ hours a week, and
they have yards that look like the ninth whole at a golf course, and
they maintain it themselves. Many of my tenants on the other hand, work 2
hours a week depending on the length of unemployment line, so one might
deduce that their yard would be drop dead gorgeous, because they have
so much time to work in it. This is not the case however, I can see
missing a Twinkie wrapper when you get out of your car, but how in the
heck do you accidentally leave a couch in the front yard.
13.
It is possible to mow a lawn, with a push mower in 1 hand and 40 ounces
of Colt 45 in the other. I was extremely pleased to discover this
because I have been mowing my lawn for years and was always stuck
wearing a beer helmet.
Maybe it is just me, but it seems like quick cash, with zero risk and no hassles.
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