Melvin Feller Asks the Question if You are Addicted to Work

Melvin Feller Asks the Question if You are Addicted to Work


Melvin Feller Business Ministries Group in Burkburnett and Dallas Texas and Lawton Oklahoma. Our mission is to call and equip a generation of Christian entrepreneurs to do business as ministry. We provide workshops and resources that help companies discover how to do business God’s way. When the heart of a business is service rather than self it can be transformed into a fruitful business ministry earning a profit and being of service to the community and their customers. Melvin Feller is currently pursuing another graduate degree in business organizations.

You are addicted to Work by Melvin Feller

When I was growing up, my dad sometimes worked three jobs in order to make ends meet. In addition to investing in real estate and doing all the work himself and with my brother and me.

However, I never remember my dad doing his jobs at home. Their bosses did not call him at home, his co-workers did not stop by the house to drop off work and they never even talked about their jobs much, except to tell funny stories about customers or maybe gripe a bit about the boss.
Boy, have things changed. We all seem to be connected more than ever to our jobs. Because of cell phones and e-mails, our jobs never seem to be more than a heartbeat away.

You are addicted to Work by Melvin Feller

Who has not witnessed the person on his iPhone at his kid’s baseball game? On the other hand, the woman who can’t get off her cell phone while dining with her family or friends? Moreover, what about the e-mail that arrives at 3 a.m.?


When I listened to an interview with Tom Stern about his book, “CEO Dad,” he was quite serious for being such a funny person. He did not shy away from admitting that he thrived on work, and got a “high” from being a bigshot businessperson. However, as we all know can happen, life smacked him upside the head. He faced a series of personal traumas that finally made him take a hard look at his life and his priorities.

You are addicted to Work by Melvin Feller

It used to be so easy for me to turn on my phone’s answering machine and close my office door at a certain time. Now, with this 24/7 world we live in, I find it much harder. It is as I am afraid if I do not keep up with what is going on, I will somehow fall behind. In addition, who knows when that next great opportunity will come along?


Then, I try to stop what I am doing and ask myself this question: “What is the most important thing going on right now?” On one hand, I have e-mail to check and phone messages to return. On the other hand, my family wants to play Frisbee in the backyard or watch “Sandlot” for the 10th time. Thankfully, I still have the inner strength to turn on the answering machine and close the office door. The day I cannot do that anymore is the day I know I have gone to the dark side.


So, while I have found a way to balance my work and family life, have you? One way to tell may be if you answer “yes” to three or more of these 20 questions from Workaholics Anonymous www.workaholics-anonymous.org:


1. Do you get more excited about your work than about family or anything else?
2. Are there times when you can charge through your work and other times when you cannot?
3. Do you take work with you to bed? On weekends? On vacation?
4. Is work the activity you like to do best and talk about most?

You are addicted to Work by Melvin Feller

5. Do you work more than 40 hours a week?
6. Do you turn your hobbies into moneymaking ventures?
7. Do you take complete responsibility for the outcome of your work efforts?
8. Have your family or friends give up expecting you on time?
9. Do you take on extra work because you are concerned that it will not otherwise be done?
10. Do you underestimate how long a project will take and then rush to complete it?

You are addicted to Work by Melvin Feller

11. Do you believe that it is OK to work long hours if you love what you are doing?
12. Do you get impatient with people who have other priorities besides work?
13. Are you afraid that if you do not work hard you will lose your job or be a failure?
14. Is the future a constant worry for you even when things are going very well?
15. Do you do things energetically and competitively including play?
16. Do you get irritated when people ask you to stop doing your work in order to do something else?
17. Have your long hours hurt your family or other relationships?
18. Do you think about your work while driving, falling asleep or when others are talking?
19. Do you work or read during meals?
20. Do you believe that more money will solve the other problems in your life?

Work-life balance is something we aspire to but rarely achieve. This is particularly the case for people who work too much, including workaholics, or people who are addicted to work. Workaholics or work addiction was first used to describe an uncontrollable need to work constantly. Although there is extensive literature on the subject, work addiction is not a formally recognized medical condition or mental disorder included in the DSM.

You are addicted to Work by Melvin Feller

Work-life balance is the ideal state of having adequate income, accomplishment, and fulfillment through work, while maintaining an equal level of satisfaction through non-work social and recreational pursuits.

Workaholics, or the opposite, underemployment or unemployment, both interfere with work-life balance. Most commonly, people who are concerned about work-life balance are working people who want more time for relationships and family, but find that work has taken over.

You are addicted to Work by Melvin Feller

Most of the people struggling to achieve a good work-life balance are not addicted to work, but are hard working, ambitious adults, or parents struggling to make ends meet financially. Having put most of their energy into establishing a career which is much more difficult than it was forty years ago — it becomes hard to let go and unwind at the weekend or during the holidays. In addition, for some, issues like Facebook addiction, smartphone addiction, and internet addiction can make it harder still to focus on relaxation, time with partners and children, and pursuits that you cannot put on your resume.


A good work-life balance means knowing how to relax and switch off from work, and actually doing this. Part of work-life balance is feeling good about doing this, having absolutely no sense of guilt or obligation about working or not working, and recognizing the benefits of a happy and fulfilling personal life to your success and happiness at work.

You are addicted to Work by Melvin Feller

One of the most effective ways of achieving good work-life balance is to find your optimal level at work and settle into it. You do not always have to go for a promotion, more responsibility, or more money, if it is beyond your optimal level of performance, and you are constantly struggling to catch up. A better strategy is to find a job you really enjoy and can perform well at, and set your lifestyle goals accordingly. This could involve a career change or even a step down the career ladder.


Another way to balance your work and family life is to talk to, and more importantly, listen to your partner and family about what they want to do. You do not have to just do what they want, but try and find some common ground and experiences you can share. You might not find it as stimulating as work, but in time, you will find it more fulfilling.

You are addicted to Work by Melvin Feller

Finally, do not enslave yourself to your employer. Work the hours you are paid to work and no more.

Take your vacation and do something fun. Take sick time when you are ill. These rights have been fought for so that workers can have a decent quality of life have respect for your predecessors and appreciate their efforts.

If you try these strategies and find you just can’t stop yourself from working, it might be time to seek professional help. A psychologist or counselor can help you to understand why you feel the need to work so hard, and can help you listen to and empathize with your partner.

Melvin Feller Business Organization Graduate Candidate and Business Coach

Melvin Feller Business Consultants Ministries Group in Texas and Oklahoma. Melvin Feller founded Melvin Feller Business Consultants Group Ministries in the 1970s to help individuals and organizations achieve their specific Victory. Victory as defined by the individual or organization are achieving strategic objectives, exceeding goals, getting results or desired outcomes. He has extensive experience assisting businesses achieve top and bottom line results. He has broad practical experience creating WINNERS in many organizations and industries. He has hands-on experience in executive leadership, operations, logistics, sales, program management, organizational development, training, and customer service. He has coached teams to achieve results in strategic planning, business development, organizational design, sales, and customer response and business process improvement. He has prepared and presented many workshops nationally and internationally.